Readers of this blog know that recently I have not been posting regularly. I wrote about it here. Thank you to all the people who sent kind messages after my last post. I appreciate them more than you can possibly imagine.
The truth is, I have been in a funk.
Every step of my last few runs has been a struggle, but I do believe in the truth of the Kara Goucher quote above, so I keep running.
A simple way to get back in the habit of putting my thoughts to paper (or to the computer, in this case) is to recap my fitness activities of the week, so I am linking up with Kim and Deborah at Running on the Fly and Confessions of a Mother Runner for their Weekly Rundown.
Monday
- Three-minute plank
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- Bill and I ran our hilly 4.08-mile out and back route on tired legs. I had not slept well the night before and my heart rate showed it.
- I have been doing this 30-day online yoga program. Sessions typically last between 15 – 30 minutes, and I do them after running. Right now, I am loving yoga. The instructor, however, does the sessions “with” her dog, Benji, so it can be difficult for me to watch at times, because it reminds me of my dog Benji, and doing yoga after running means that I am always last to shower. You realize this means I am then the person who has the job of wiping down the glass surrounding the shower. *Sigh* The things we do for fitness, right?
Tuesday
- 30 push-ups
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- I ran a 5.11-mile route in town with Bill. Initially, I felt great but we made the mistake of grocery shopping before running, so it was very hot by the time we finished and I did not have anything to eat until almost noon.
- 20 minutes of yoga.
Wednesday
- 2:45 plank
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- Bill and I ran my current favorite trail route – 7.5 miles in the nearby State Game Lands. We typically do trail runs with our friend Al on Thursdays but Al was scheduled for cataract surgery this week, so we switched it to Wednesday instead. The day was very hot and humid but I love this run, and we took it easy. It was, by far, the best run of the week for me.
- 25 minutes of yoga
Thursday
- 30 pushups
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- We ran the course where we had been doing our virtual 5Ks earlier in the year but not at race pace. In fact, not even close to race pace. My legs were tired and I was ready for a rest day.
- 20 minutes of yoga.
Friday
- Rest day! We hung out at our community pool and I swam a few laps, but mostly just relaxed and read. Exactly what I needed.
Saturday
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- This was our long(ish) run day and kind of embarrassing to write about. I have been struggling with my long runs lately. I get to a certain point, begin feeling hopeless, as if I can’t complete the run, and break down in tears. During this long run, Bill and I wound up having an argument halfway through the run and we ran home on separate routes. The pitfalls of being married to your running partner! I did 8.41 ugly, ugly miles.
Sunday
- 2:30 plank
- Five minutes of glute and hamstring stretches
- Bill and I (after talking out our issues from the day before) ran 3.4 uneventful miles in town.
- 16 minutes of yoga.
And, that’s a wrap.
I have gotten a lot of joy and serenity from running over the years. I now must trust those feelings of freedom, strength, and happiness will come back. For this reason, I keep plodding away, waiting for the spark to return.
Keeping the dream alive is, after all, half the battle. Thanks for the reminder, Kara.
You can find the places I link up here.
I am sorry to read that you are still struggling this week. Yes the joy and feelings of strength will come back. Thinking of you xox
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Thank you, Deborah. Today’s run was much better. The death of my dog, Benji was a real setback.
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I completely understand. Funk or depression? I go up and down a lot these days. I’m better off staying away from the news. It’s overwhelming and upsetting, isn’t it? Hang in there. You’re not alone.
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You are so right, Wendy. The news just makes a bad situation worse. If Bill turns it on, I have to leave the room sometimes. The running bloggers community is so supportive. It helps to vent to a bunch of sympathetic people who get it. We have all been there. Thanks!
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It’s totally understandable that you’re in a funk right now. I’m sure the Yoga teacher with the dog Benji is not always easy to watch. 😦
I’m sorry about the argument on your long run! We’ve kind of been at odds today. Most days I can let it roll off my back (sort of), but some days . . . anyway, this too shall pass. Good job getting out there even when you don’t feel like it!
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That’s a good attitude, Judy – this too shall pass. We have all had runs when we are just not feeling it. Today was a much better running day, but who knows what tomorrow will bring? My middle son organized a Zoom “memorial service” for Benji with my other kids and their families. We all told a Benji story. It really helped.
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Oh, I love that you were able to share memories of Benji with all your family & so glad that it helped! And very sweet of your son to think to do that.
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Lots of people are coping with unusual feelings these days. I hope your joy returns quickly.
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Thank you, Anne. Today was a better day.
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I’m glad today was better.
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wow
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Ha! Thank you?
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Wow, Laurie! Just reading your fantastic workout schedule made me tired. 🙂 So proud of you for keeping at it. You are no quitter!
Blessings!
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Thank you, Martha. I am a stubborn old bird, that’s for sure! 🙂
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Amazing routine.
I’m sad it’s still so tough for you… I hope this lifts up for you soon…
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Thank you, Eliza. I do too!
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I hear you! Blogging is very rewarding, but it’s also quite the marathon and I think we all find ourselves “at mile 20” sometimes. I like getting the view into your day to day. I’m not doing long runs at all right now because my body just doesn’t want to – as soon as it wants to I’ll ramp up the mileage again.
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That’s a good way to put it. I feel like I’m at mile 20 right now in lots of areas of my life.
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Saturday!
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Yep. We have all had ’em.
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It makes sense to me that you would be in a little bit of a funk right now. Definitely allow yourself to feel all your emotions right now. It may not feel like it right now, but running will bring you joy again. Sending you positive vibes!
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Thank you, Kim. I know if I keep going, the joy will come back someday. I appreciate the positive vibes!
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Wow, that’s a way to get your endorphins going!
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Yep. That’s why I love running!
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Thinking for you, it’s good luck, not break a leg, as I just wrote on another of your comments haha.
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Laurie, thank you for sharing your struggles in this post. I am sorry that you are dealing with that and happy for you that you are persistently pushing through regardless of your feelings. I cannot even imagine walking as many miles as you run in any given week. I think continuing to run and writing about it are great ideas. it keeps your body and mind moving, and your metaphorical pen moving too. Anytime we struggle, regardless of the struggle, doing those every day things can be the ticket to help us move forward and out of the slump. Even things like getting dressed, getting out there, etc. Best and blessings, Michele
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Thank you, Michele. I think continuing to run is good for my mental health too. I am also hoping it is the ticket to brighter days!
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Hugs to you, Laurie ❤ The beauty of running is there are no rules as to how fast, how far nor how often one has to go. Thinking of you…
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Thank you, Kim. I appreciate the thoughts! ❤
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I just read your post about your dog. I am so very sorry. Hugs to you!!
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Thank you, Zenaida. I appreciate the hugs!
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It sounds trite, but you’re doing what you feel you need to do to get through it all, your personal version of being kind to yourself. I have to admit to giggling at Saturday’s commentary though & the ugly ugly miles.
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Ha! I’m glad I could give you a laugh. It is funny to me NOW! 🙂
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I had a similar thing a number of years ago when I’d signed up (under the influence) to do a 10km event & had to learn to run.One of my best friends was training for a marathon & offered to help. There was one morning where we were standing on the side of the road & I was telling him exactly what he could do with his watch and his “okay let’s run for a minute now” and “30 seconds to go.” At the time I was so angry but now we laugh about it.
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Ha! There should be a rule about drunk race registrations. we should be able to rescind them within 24 hours! 🙂
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I’m so sorry everything has been hitting you lately! You know the joy you have in running will come back to you – hang in there!
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Thank you. I do know the joy will return. I must be patient.
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Pushing through adversity, pain, and disappointment is something runners do. And eventually we love it! No wonder normal people think we’re strange. Hang in there and keep putting one foot in front of the other!
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Danny, you are a runner. You know what it’s like to go through a slump. It happens to all of us. It’s not fun but it will pass. I hope! 🙂 Thank you.
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I’m liking Friday 🙂
It looks like you are serious about staying healthy and in good shape. I won’t be keeping an exercise journal anytime soon. I am hoping that the physical nature of my leisure activities is beneficial.
Stay safe and stay active.
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I like Fridays too. I look forward to a rest day by Friday. Thanks for the good wishes!
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I admire you for continuing to run anyway, Laurie. Your self-discipline will pay off because I’m with you in trusting that the joy WILL return in time. The past few months have been so taxing on us all in different ways, and the effects are becoming evident in different ways too. I’m so sorry to hear about Benji. 😦 Losing a pet is losing a member of the family.
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Thank you, Lisa. I have to trust that joy will return in time.
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Great recap, you are active! And yes, totally agree, keep the dream alive, and share it here 🍀👌
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Thank you, Kellie. That’s what I hope to do!
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It’s super easy to fall into a funk these days. Even the most positive people I know are struggling to find the bright spots right now. I can include myself in that list 😦
Hang in there. I know you will find that joy again!
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Thank you, Jenn. This community of running bloggers is so supportive. We have all been there.
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I can honestly say I’ve never thought of any workout as good, but I take the point of the quote: do more of what makes you joyful and balanced. I’m sorry you’ve been in a funk, but frankly it’s a miracle we all aren’t in one constantly. Much is being asked of us, in ways that rankle. Still we carry on, trusting the process will take us to where we need to be. Happy running!
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I have always said running keeps me sane and calm (relatively speaking). Thank you, Ally. I had a run today and it was happy.
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Props on continuing to stick with your runs/workouts while dealing with some depression. One of the main things my counselor encouraged years ago when I went through a depression spell following my split with Jason/moving back to the area was to force myself to do things that I loved. i think the goal was to try to keep life as “normal routine” as possible knowing eventually the joy would come back in the activities. Also props on sticking to the glute/hamstring work!
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Thank you, Tracy. I have always said that running helps keep me sane and calm. It still does. We all go through rough patches. This is mine. I think I need those endorphins we get from a good run. I had a good, hilly one this morning. I don’t ever want to go back to the injury I had to my piriformis and hamstring. That was awful. I do my stretches religiously.
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It’s been a difficult year for even the hardiest of souls who are unfazed by current events … I think we all will emerge stronger in the end; it’s just getting through the daily grind one day at a time. You have a great exercise regimen Laurie, one that a 20-something runner or health enthusiast would covet to be able to get through on a daily basis. Don’t sell yourself short … you have had a ton of disappointments this year from making plans for races, a vacation trip to Portugal, a trip to see Atti on his birthday – all scratched due to COVID-19 to the loss of your trusted companion just last week. No wonder your emotions are raw. I liked this line from this post: “During this long run, Bill and I wound up having an argument halfway through the run and we ran home on separate routes. The pitfalls of being married to your running partner! I did 8.41 ugly, ugly miles.” Take care.
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I hope we will all emerge stronger, Linda. I am searching for the light at the end of the tunnel, hoping it’s not a train coming toward me! Ugh! 2020!!!
Thank you. We ran again today and it was a much better run.
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That’s good Laurie, but it is difficult to stay positive just turning on the news. The idea of a resurgence just beats me down. Our Governor has been very diligent about slow openings each phase and we are definitely regressing.
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Our governor has been good too, but he meets resistance at every turn. It is discouraging. People have to realize they can’t just will this virus away. We have to begin looking out for each other.
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We have the same thing going on and starting Monday, we have to wear a mask in any public place and any crowded outside venues or a $500.00 fine. If a business is caught with an unmasked patron in the store, they have a fine and risk their license being taken away. Maybe people will abide by rules and respect one another now.
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I think that is reasonable. If we can’t look out for each other without incentives, maybe a fine is needed to punish bad behavior.
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That would be a start for sure Laurie.
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Your workout schedule makes mine look pretty wimpy. But you do you, and I do me . . . and there is so much to grieve these days for all of us, even if we don’t somehow feel like we deserve to because other people have it so much worse than we do during this mind-bending time. And then to lose your beloved dog . . . no wonder you’re hitting the emotional wall when exercise has chipped away at the dam that keeps the feelings from flooding you. Hang in there.
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Exactly right, Jan. We will each do ourselves. Thank goodness we are all one of a kind. In many ways, running keeps me sane and calm. Today was a better day.
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It’s good to see you back on your blog! You had a good week of workouts and I’m glad you and your running partner sorted things out.
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Thank you, Deb. I am glad we sorted things out too! 🙂
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[…] have written here about my struggles with long runs this spring. It was getting better. I was crying less and […]
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